Well after two more blood tests today we went in to see the Sono and hopefully the heartbeat. The doctor wanted me to come in last week but I knew at six weeks we would not be able yet to see a heartbeat and my heart just could not take that. So I opted to wait until seven weeks and two days. One of my good friends Michelle went with me because I just couldn’t face it alone (kids at school and hubby at work). When they started the sono I started to cry, I just couldn’t take the stress any longer. Then Michelle said look at the screen I can see it. I just closed my eyes; I couldn’t bare seeing what I saw back in December. I couldn’t bare having it happen again and at that moment I knew…. If this isn’t successful I do not have the strength to try again. This realization made me cry harder and squeeze my eyes tighter. For a few more moments I needed to believe it was all ok. But then the nurse said “Look” please… “look at your baby”… I slowly opened my eyes, gathering all my will and looked. What I saw was the most amazing thing… a fast heart fluttering. This blurr not quite looking human but more of tadpolish but alive none the less. There is after so many tries our baby.