what do you see?

So as I stand in a room full of women who are all looking at me. They are waiting for me to say something exciting, something uplifting. Nothing is coming to my mind. I mumble something out and turn the floor over to someone else who has witty commits to spare. Along with some other ladies I am starting a woman’s service group. We are a community group. We are all range in age from 18 – 60. Now I really truly believe that a person is only as old as one feels and acts. With that said some people do not realize how old they act or rather they think and view the world around them. This lead me to think what do people think when they look at me? Do they see a woman that is trying her best to just keep it together? Do they see a mom who is doing all she can to enrich her kids lives to the fullest? A wife that is doing all she can to love the husband and life he provides. There are some days I walk around with a smile all day just knowing what a wonderful life I have and then there are days like today. Days I frown and pout and just wear my headache on my sleeve. Days people must think I am brat and ridicules. And to be honest I agree with them. I have more then most. I have it better then a ton of people. Why can’t I ever be just happy? Why must I have this constant state of mental and emotional clutter to contend with? I keep my life in chaos, leading to over eating, leading to depression. Do people see this in me? Do I have them fooled? Do I want to fool them?

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A Place For Everything

removing the clutter...forever

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