When you’re stressed…. just party!

Poison – I Want Action

This past week has been full with the home looking, offering and counter offering game…. my head hurts! We are still technically homeless and with all that I decided to go to a rock concert with my BFF Shelly and then off to the beach for a week. My one true love Bret Micheals and Poison is playing tonight… well second one true love right behind Crazydad … duh!

So if anyone sees a house in the 200K range close to CD’s work that was built this decade with a decent roof and A/C with an in ground pool whom the sellers are willing to pay the closing cost, 1.5 % back in repairs, set up college funds for both my kids and toss in lifetime laundry service … would you please drop me a link. We took butler and maid off our “must have” list so we are compromising.

See you all in a week!

Psssst look what I got… I’ll sell ya some…

I take a few medication from time to time. I have always gotten cold sores so I will on occasion take a prescription for that. I also take a water retention pill (that also keeps my blood presser down), I also have asthma and take related medication for that. Well I also take a prescription pill for Acid reflux AKA heart burn. None of the pills I take are addictive or “goofy” pills as my grandmother puts it, none of them are high dollar street pills but for some stupid reason my new doctor insists on having me come in every three months to “see” her to get my refills. Why can’t she just write me a year’s prescription like every other doctor and we all live happily ever after… But no the appointment goes something like this: 

We walk in sit in the big waiting room for about an hour all the while I am reminding my “angels” to behave. Looking around trying to decide what super bug we will catch from these sick people in the room. Reminding my children not to touch, lick, hug the furniture with sick germs crawling all over them. Then they finally call me back I get my blood pressure taken and weighed~ what fun! Then we wait in the small waiting room where my angel proceeds to completely trash the room…. Make me come every three months and I’ll make you remember me. Then the doctor comes in…

Doctor: How have you been?

Me: exactly the same as I was in May.

Doctor: Is everything going ok with this medication?

Me: Everything has been fine. It’s been working for the last seven years so I don’t anticipate any problems now.

Doctor: ok then (writing out RX) have a great day.

Me: You enjoy your dinner funded by my co-pay.  

So now armed with my super strong and highly desirable heartburn meds I’m off to the pharmacy to wait another hour.     

Dinner and a show.

I went on a date last night. My date was very nice; we had dinner at Olive Garden and went to the movies to see The Nanny Diaries. Dinner was far too many points to count and yes I paid the price later but that really is TMI. It was a lovely evening and my beautiful sister was my escort. It was so much fun having some “girl” time with her. She has just recently met a new guy and she just went on and on about him and I just listened and marveled at the energy, not to mention money dating in today’s society requires.

 

She talked about her job and her college classes and her roommate troubles and I just listened. I listened with the ear of a friend but also with the ear of an older sister. I kept my opinions to myself all night and she just rambled on and on, which is not like her so it was so nice to actually hear what she is thinking.   

 

Being a single twenty something trying to find ones self and way in the world is so difficult and the road has so many bumps and possibly wrong turn offs. I think the hardest part of all is not so much the ride the traveler feels but the hardest seat is the one of the person who has already traveled that road and is watching.

 So as we were on the ride home last night I finally dared give my opinion on the “new guy” and to my surprise she listened and not the kind of listen you do when in your mind you are nodding in agreement but really thinking “whatever you crazy person” but she really seemed genuinely interested in what my advice was. It was so nice; it was the kind of evening I have always hoped for with my sister. I am can not wait for many more “dates” to come.

it’s 7:40am and my day is complete.

I walked today…. now I’m going back to bed…….

Who’s in control? Clearly not me…..

So as one can gather from the lack of updates on my diet blog page, the diet lifestyle change is not going so well and has all but stalled. I was on a six week roll. I was following weight watchers, walking 2 miles a day doing really good. Then I went on a two week vacation and ate how I wanted and didn’t exercise and came home prepared to work but when I got home and on the scale I found I was two pounds lighter then when I left!?!? How could that be? All the work and diet changes and I lose more on vacation? WTF?

So I have been stalled for the last two weeks and have not exercised or ate right or got on the scale. In fact yesterday I found myself sitting with a bowl of raw brownie mix (minus the egg) spoon feeding not only myself but my two baby birds. When I spoke the words “ok guys enough go play the rest is moms” I realized I had a problem. I got up tossed out the mix~ bowl, spoon and all and really wanted to cry. What am I doing? What am I teaching them? I have in the past considered doing Lapband surgery or Gastric Bypass but I always come back to being scared. The “what if’s” haunt me. What if I’m 1 of the “3 in 200 (1.5%)”  people who die after surgery for weight loss? Or what if it works and then after a while I regain then where do I turn? Or what if it just plain doesn’t work?

 

 

I read stories in magazines like Sharon Osbourne and Star Jones and see how they have had wild success and wish it could be me. But then I read stories like Carnie Wilson who still really struggles.

 

I think I have the short end of the stick all around, meaning I think I definitely have a mental issue with food but I think I may also have medical issues with food. I have PCOS, I have never used this as an excuse for being overweight because I am accountable for everything I place in my body but really this vacation (two whole weeks) points out to me maybe there is something beyond my control and would having one of those surgeries even help me?  

 

Just one more thing that seems out of control in my life.

Wordless Wednesday


AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


Life whizzing by….

 
I truly can not believe how life is whizzing by me. My son is a skillful deal maker and my daughter can reach the light switch. Both children ask for their “privacy” and I for a few moments think “I’m the only one here” and then realize they are speaking to me. They have become real people. Can you believe it because I can’t?

In some small way I secretly inside enjoy the times when one of them calls out to me that they are scared or need a hug because it means just for that much longer they are my babies.

I can hardly believe that this is my last year home with the boy before he goes off into the big bad world of kindergarten. We spent time this weekend with some friends. Their son who is almost a full year younger then mine is so much for adventurous, from riding his bike without training wheels to skillfully driving a four wheeler to swimming like a seasoned surfer. I’m sure having a pool and living in a much more rural area had something to do with it but more over I think he is their third child and JM is our first is more of a factor. I’m sure the boys’ personalities play a part as well.

I wish I could just let him do his thing and make his own mistakes and not hover over him all the time, but it is so hard for me to let go. The girl I don’t really worry about. Not only will she kick ass in life she will take prisoners. I truly worry about the boy she will marry and the many that will come before him and try and be crushed.

Anyway like I said life is whizzing by….. right over my toes.

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